


College is... Confusing

by verystrangehuman



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bill Is Dipper's Teacher, Bill is gay, College Student Dipper Pines, I believe that Mable mellowed out with age, I project myself on Dipper a lot, M/M, Mable and Dipper rent an apartment together, Older Dipper Pines, so is Dipper
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-11-02 05:13:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20632892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/verystrangehuman/pseuds/verystrangehuman
Summary: When Mable and Dipper go to college in Gravity Falls Oregon, Dipper has no expectations to develop a crush on the professor of his favorite class.But life has a funny way of surprising you sometimes...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what this sudden burst of inspiration came from but... she's here...

Mable shook me awake with an excited grin. Her hair fell around her face to frame her face.

Her heart-shaped face showed eyes with sparkles in them and happiness leaked from her expression.

“Come on Bro Bro! College starts today, and I’m not going to be late!” She exclaimed happily.

I smiled at her enthusiasm, despite the urge to groan and shoo her away. I couldn’t though. When Mable Pines gets excited she can easily break my leg if I push her out of her huge pink hampster ball of happiness.

“Fiiiiinnnnnnneeeeee,” I groaned with a tired smile on my face.

She laughed.

I pushed her face out of the way and sat up in bed. I swung my legs to the side of the bed and stood with a stretch, lifting my arms behind my head and cracking my back. I pushed her out of my room and walked to my dresser. I grabbed a light grey tee-shirt with the word, “Blah” written four times. I then grabbed a pair of blue skinny jeans. I put the clothes on, not bothering to shower, as I had done that the night before. Once the clothes were on I took some red flannel out and put my arms through the long sleeves.

I then put on my hat with a blue pine tree on it that Grunkle Stan had gotten for me in the summer of eighth grade (soon to be ninth). I walked out the door and found Mable and our roommate Emily sitting on the couch watching, _Rick and Morty_ on our TV.

I cleared my throat and the two girls whipped their heads around with smiles on their faces.

"You excited for our first day?" Mable asked.

"Mhm, how could I not be?" Of course, I was lying, there were so many things that could go wrong with today, and thinking about all of them only made the anxiety worse...

I had to make sure Mable thought I was fine though because last time I felt bad she put me on suicide lockdown. Now I can't blame her for that, but the way she did it was... not as okay.

* * *

_"Dipper? How can I help? In what ways are you feeling bad? Can I even help? Goddamnit! Why is this so hard?" She asked as she ran across the house while our parents were out in full panic mode, "Should I call mom and dad?"_

_She screamed causing my anxiety to blow up and I quickly began to hyperventilate. She didn't even notice. She just kept running around trying to find out what to do. _

_I tried to tell her I was feeling worse now but my body wouldn't let me. I just sat on the ground shaking, and hugging my legs to my chest in terror. Tears blurred my vision as sobs wracked through my body. _

* * *

I sat down with the two girls on the pastel green couch.

We watched with the occasional yell of, "Fuck you, Jerry!", from Emily, to which I would just laugh.

Emily wore gothic clothes, but she was always cheery as could be. She was one of the coolest people I had met in high school, and she was a charismatic as Mable, if not more. In high school, she had a myriad of friends, but she, Mable and I could never be separated. We all separately chose the same college to go to, so we decided that it'd be a good idea to live together through college.

We all watched the show together until Mable's alarm went off for her eight am class. She stood with a giddy smile.

"Oh, My, GOD! I'm so excited!" Mable exclaimed, almost jumping up and down that way she does when she's overly happy.

"I'm so excited for you!" Emily replied as she jumped up to hug the taller girl.

Emily and Mable laughed happily and I smiled at the two.

"You wanna walk to the campus with me?" I asked.

Mable pulled away and nodded with a smile that reached her ears.

I smiled at her clear enthusiasm and stood.

She was about two inches taller than me, as I was pretty short for a guy, I supposed that was fine, though. It's not like people liked me less because of it, well girls never really liked it, but I'm gay so...

She brought her bent arm out and I interlocked it with mine. We waved bye to Emily and she smiled and waved back.

We exited the apartment and she began to skip after letting my arm go. Some things never change, and Mable, though she did mellow out a bit since middle school, will never.

"Bro Bro?"

"Hmm?"

"Well... I know I'm acting as excited as ever, I am, but... I- I'm terrified! Please tell me I'm not alone!" Mable cried out, causing people to look at us on the street and quickly look away.

"Oh, thank god! I thought I was alone!" I replied.

She smiled at me and said, "Promise to stick with me if I become a bitch by the time school's out?"

"Of course! Where would I be without you Mabes?" I asked in response.

She laughed and turned back to me, "I'm glad I wasn't born alone."

I nodded, "Me too."

The campus wasn't far so Mable and I made it there quickly and she waved bye to me after a long hug.

I walked home with a million thoughts running through my head. When I opened the door Emily was in the middle of one of her rants into the phone to a telemarketer.

"And then he left! Can you believe that, girl?"

Then came a muffled, "Oh, honey I'm so sorry- wait my boss says I gotta go back to scamming people, byeee!"

"Bye!" She made a waving motion even though the person on the other line couldn't see her.

She hung up and looked at me.

"'Sup Dip?" She asked.

“The sky.”

“Actually the sky is technically all around us as we live on Earth, and the sky is in the atmosphere,” She replied, like the know it all she is.

She was to be a middle school science teacher, so that’s why she knew this and just  _ had _ to tell me.

I just rolled my eyes at her antics.

“Hey? Wanna talk? You look tense…” She asked, a worried tone in her voice.

“Sure, I mean, there’s not much to say, it’s just college anxiety…”

“Oh, honey! I don’t care how much you have to say, if you had to say a sentence or a whole fifty-page rant, I’d listen!” She said with a smile, and patted the couch spot next to her, “Now sit!”

I sat down next to her and began to talk.

“Well… I mean, it’s just all the common stuff a high schooler, going into college, would feel. Like um… What if my teachers are assholes? And what if my classmates never stop talking like in high school? What if I go back into the place I was in Sophmore year? What if I fail all my classes? I’m so scared! My whole future is decided by this school year! If I don't do well I’ll-”

“Honey? Listen. You’re the smartest person I know, and if your professors don’t see that then they’re the stupid ones, who don’t deserve to work at a college. Your writing is amazing, and you know almost everything in the world of anomalies! That’s what you’re majoring in right?” She cut me off.

I smiled at her and nodded, “Yeah that’s my major… You really think all that stuff?”

“Baby, I know all that stuff!” She said, “Okay, now let's watch  _ Heathers _ on Netflix until your class later tonight!”

I smiled and replied with a, “You know me so fuckin’ well, it’s ridiculous!”

At about  _ Dead Girl Walking _ I got a call from Mable.

“Dipper? I’m out of class now and it was amazing! We legit just learned about each other and the teacher’s like so nice! Her name’s Janice, and she’s like twenty-five. We talked for a while and she’s so cool! I think you’d like her! Did you know Pacifica goes here? She’s in my psych class and she apparently became hella sad since high school. I hope she feels better! I wonder what happened to her, but back to my teacher… She complimented my sweater and says she likes my optimistic outlook on life. Says that in the field of psych people need to feel like they’re in a safe place without any reason to be sad or negative energy. And that my energy is just right, says I’m just the amount of happy and mellow that people should feel safe around me.”

I just listened to her, because I knew that Mable Pines goes on long rants about things she gets excited about, and I never dared interrupt.

“Awesome!” I exclaimed when I knew she was done, “I’m happy you like your major!”

“I really do!” She yelled into the phone, making it so I had to pull the phone away from my ear in order to not go deaf.

“I’m coming home now, so be ready for ecstatic Mable!” She stated and hung up before I could get a word in.

“Mable?” Emily asked.

I nodded, and looked back at the TV to see it had been paused and said, “Thanks for pausing the thing.”

“Mhm. It’s not like I’m gonna just let you miss out on JD and Veronica’s kinky sex!”

“You know I don’t ship them, right?” I asked, cringing at the memory of some of the gross fan art of the two doing… things that Emily just  _ had _ to show me.

“Yup, but I do, so onward!”

I laughed and rolled my eyes before unpausing the TV with the Roku remote.

Thirty minutes later the musical was over and Mable was walking through the door.

“Hello, friends!” She said as she walked over to the couch and plopped down next to me.

“Hey, Mabes!” Emily said and rested her head on Mable’s shoulder.

The two were very touchy, no one could deny that, but they were most certainly not into each other. We all cuddle, that’s just a part of friendship for us. We’re all touch starved and we need physical contact. We never go past cuddling though, we talked about it, and that’s way too much.

“Wanna watch  _ Stranger Things _ again?” I asked and they perked up at the mention and nodded, wagging their non-existent tails.

I went to Netflix and turned it on, causing the others to direct their attention to the TV. 

Suddenly it was seven-thirty, and the timer for my class went off.

I stood from the couch and bid goodbye to my friend and sister.

When I exited the appartment I walked down the stairs and make my way past the park, take a left and walk two blocks. When I get there I smile and walk into the building that has my class in it. I find my room, 7-1-25.

I walk inside to find what looked to be a high school classroom. I supposed not many people signed up for this course, well that just meant more help from the teacher if I need it.

I sat down in front, as I was early.

The man sitting at the desk in front of all the others looked up at me and smiled, before looking back down at what he was doing.

I pulled out my laptop and sat in silence, waiting for class to begin. When students finally began showing up, I prepared myself for loud ringing, but then remembered that the bell chimed in high school, not college, and I was grateful as all hell for that.

When the class started and the teacher stood I noticed got time to look at him better than I could before.

And he was hot… Like... Really hot…


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bill's POV, and we see what happens in class.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to update every Saturday!

I looked around at the kids I was to teach this year. They all looked to be the nerdy type. Which did make sense, as I am too.

This being my first year as a teacher, I was nervous that the kids wouldn’t like me, but I knew that was irrational now because these kids looked just like me at their age. Not that I was much older than them. I was only twenty-six. So still young but not as young as them.

“Welcome to my class on anomalies, My name is Bill, I will not be telling you my last name, because I just want you to call me Bill. In this class, we’ll be mostly referring to a place called Gravity Falls (which also happens to be where we are), as it has the most anomalies out of any place that has been documented, and now with Stanford Pines’ best-selling journal three, we can do even more research on these amazing occurrings. Speaking of Journal three… you will all need a copy of that book because I'm not going to read to you like you’re three-year-olds.”

There were sighs throughout the classroom, but a boy in the front just smiled and looked down at the desk, which was like an elementary school desk in that it had a small, black compartment at the bottom of it for books to go.

I continued with a, "Yeah, yeah, bestsellers cost money, but you could probably get your at various Book Nooks around town, and trust me there are a _lot._ Also, you'll need some way to do your assignments on, I will not be taking up work that's written on lined paper. I suggest using a Chrome Book, as their battery life is pretty long, plus they're cheaper than most other computers, or y' know, buy a Mac Book off E-bay, and get a huge rip-off, whatever. Also, you should bring your device to class, so you can take notes, you could also use a notebook, but bringing your device is better so you can use it to play Minecraft in class!" 

Most of the kids in the class snickered and I smiled at them. I always liked to make people laugh, it was just a thing for me. I liked knowing that I triggered that reaction.

"Anyway, now that that's out of the way, you're free to ask questions about me."

A hand in the back shot up immediately causing me to just nod at the person.

"Um, hi... My name's Lia and I was wondering if you're single?" The girl said with a few bats of her eyelashes.

I grimaced, I didn't think I'd get people who are just so open about being thirsty for the teacher, but life has ways of surprising you I supposed.

"Yeah, I'm single, but I'm also gay. Next," I replied with an eye roll.

A girl who looked much too young to be in a college class raised her hand.

"Y' know you guys don't have to raise your hands..." I mumbled and pointed to her to signal she could ask her question.

"I was just wondering what inspired you to teach this stuff?"

"Well, when I was fourteen I decided to want to study the paranormal, and when I was sixteen I decided it was important for other people to learn about that stuff too, so I thought, 'Well, Bill? Why not teach the shit?' so I decided that's when I decided I'd be a teacher on anomalies. Also, there aren't enough people out there who just think, yeah, I should teach about the paranormal. So I decided I'd be someone with that ambition." I explained.

Of course that wasn't the real reason, but why would I tell these kids the real reason?

The girl looked at me and said, "I want to be a teacher of the paranormal too, you're not alone."

I smiled at her.

A boy in front with a blue pine tree on his hat timidly asked, "How o-old are y-you?"

"Twenty-six," I answered.

He nodded.

I heard a boy in the back yell, "Aw, Dipper's scared to talk!"

Most of the class glared at the boy and one girl even said, "Shut up Chad! It's not high school anymore, you can't just be an asshole to a kid 'cause he's quiet!"

The girl smiled at the boy with the pine tree hat, "Dipper" the boy in the back said his name was.

"Okay, settle down, also, 'Chad'? That was a dick move, and yet I'm getting small dick vibes from you."

"Oooh," The class said, most of them cracking smiles and Dipper looked up at me with gratitude in his eyes.

I nodded to him, and once everyone had settled we continued this little routine of one of them asking questions and me answering them to the best of my ability (but also lying quite a bit, because I can't be completely truthful around... well... anyone).

Soon class was over and I was walking to the bus stop. When the bus came I got on, payed and sat down in the front. I starred out the window, counting trees. An old woman sat next to me. 

Her whole look dripped of, "I'm a nice Christian grandmother who loves minion memes!". And that in itself was enough to make me hate the old woman.

She smiled towards me, to which I smiled back, just because she repulsed me didn't mean I couldn't be nice! After that I looked back to the window.

When i got off the bus I walked to my flat which I shared with a roommate. 

"Hey Tom!" i yelled as I opened the door.

Tom was in the living room, in his demon form, cuddled up with his boyfriend, Marco.

"'Sup Bill," Marco asked, eyes glued to his phone, clearly reading something from how his eyes were moving side to side rapidly.

I sat down on a chair next to the couch, "Hey, you guys mind if I watch a movie?"

"Like what?" Tom asked.

"_Donny Darco_?"

Marco gasped, "Of course! Right Tom?"

"It has my vote," Tom replied with a sharp-toothed smile.

I nodded and put it into the Roku search. Turns out it was on Amazon prime for free. 

We began to watch, and Marco fell asleep within half-an-hour. Tom and i began to talk in hushed voices once he fell asleep.

"How was your first day of class?" Tom asked.

"Fine... Everyone, except one kid named Chad, was pretty nerdy and cool."

Tom nodded, "That's good."

"Y' know, you can go back into demon form, you're not there anymore, and I know you hate that meat sack..."

"Oh. Right."

I stood and went back into my demon form, an yellow, brick triangle. I had a top hat, bow-tie, and one huge, glowing eye in the middle of my "face".

I sat down on the couch again.

My eye was illuminating the dark of the room with the TV.

"How was you and Marco's anniversary?" I asked.

"It was great... If ya know what I mean."

"You didn't!" I whisper yelled.

"Oh, I did. And it was amazing, for both of us."

"Nice, bro!" I quietly high fived him.

He nodded.

"Anyway, any cute dudes in your class?"

"Well, there was this one boy, tripped over his words and was constantly blushing. He was stuttering out of control. He had fluffy, brown hair. He was skinny but not in a scrawny way-"

"So like, completely your type, huh?" Tom asked, wiggling his eyebrows in the dim light.

I rolled my eye, "Shut your ass up. It's not like I'm actually going to date this guy, he's just cute."

"If you say so..." He replied with a smirk.

"Oh wait, there was this thirsty girl who wanted to bang me in my latest class."

"You're kidding, right?" Tom asked, clearly holding back loud laughter.

"No, she legit raised her hand, and asked, 'are you single?' I just said, 'yeah, but I'm gay, so...'"

“Wow… Just… Wow…” Tom seemed at a loss for words.

“Exactly!” I whisper shouted.

“Well, I should go to sleep dude. G’night.” I said as I stood and began to walk to my room.

As I began to fall asleep, I wondered what the next day would hold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me on Instagram: verystrangehuman (or don't... I can't make you do anything...)

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Instagram if you want... @verystrangehuman


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